What to do

Abusive partners often plead for another chance, but their true motive is to prevent you from leaving. Though they may seem sincere, they usually return to their abusive and controlling ways once forgiven.

For change to occur, your partner must take full responsibility for their actions and stop blaming external factors such as stress, drugs, alcohol, mental health, or temper. You may feel responsible for fixing their problems, but staying and enduring repeated abuse only reinforces their behavior.

Even after going through counseling, some partners remain violent and controlling. If your partner has stopped making excuses and minimizing the problem, that's a good sign. However, you should base your decision on their current actions rather than hoping they will change.

You may fear your partner's reaction, your living situation, or your ability to support yourself and your children. But don't let fear of the unknown keep you in an unsafe and unhealthy situation.

The Domestic Violence Line's caseworkers can provide additional support at 1800 65 64 63.